Nude

(Tune: Men of Harlech)

What the use of wearing panties
Whalebone corsets of your Auntie's
Boxer shorts and other scanties
Best of all is nude
There's such fun in going bra-less
Now that it's no longer lawless
'Specially if your figure's flawless
Best of all is nude
Nude is what you're born in
Shirts are never torn in
Underwear and lacy flimsies, garter belts and other whimsies
Yards of itchy cloth to put your form in
Ducks all do it, maidens rue it
Even ancient Picts in Britain blue it
Going naked's how to do it
Best of all is nude!

If your garters aren't elastic
Tie them up in knots fantastic
(Panty hose is something drastic!)
Best of all is nude!
If you're tired of wearing clotheses
Shed your garment 'mongst the roses
Never mind the old bluenoses
Best of all is nude!
Nude is best for ducking!
Worst for horses bucking!
Moonlit nights will see such sights
that are very best for fooling round
and elbows!
Nudity is grand to see
A well-known antidote to virginity
Take your clothes off and you'll see:
Best of all is nude!

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